


Take It Slow

by Felurian1



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Abandoned Work - Unfinished and Discontinued, Angst with a Happy Ending, Blindfolds, Caring Dean Winchester, Coming In Pants, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gentle Dean Winchester, Hurt Sam Winchester, Kissing, M/M, Protective Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester Has PTSD, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Touching
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-06
Updated: 2020-09-30
Packaged: 2021-03-07 02:02:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,640
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26329096
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Felurian1/pseuds/Felurian1
Summary: Since Sam got his soul back, he can't stand to be touched. Dean wants to help though, and together they start to find a way to make things better.
Relationships: Dean Winchester/Sam Winchester
Comments: 10
Kudos: 88
Collections: Supernatural Kink Meme





	1. Hands

It had been a problem since Sam got his soul back. Whatever wall Death had put up, it wasn’t enough to stop Sam’s body from remembering what had happened in the cage. Sam still refused to tell Dean about it, and Dean sure as hell wasn’t gonna push, but he could guess. It wasn’t hard when Sam flinched every time Dean complimented him. When every kiss felt like Dean was pushing against iron bars.

This time hadn’t even been intentional, just that the hunt had gone well and when they’d kissed it seemed better, softer, so Dean had gone further, pushed his hands up under Sam’s shirt to feel the muscle beneath and that had been it. One moment Sam was there, the next the bathroom door was slamming shut on the sound of Sammy’s shattered sobs.

An hour later, Dean was sitting on the floor outside the motel bathroom, head resting against the closed door in front of him. He’d been sat there so long that Sam’s voice surprised him

“Just leave me alone Dean, please.”

Dean felt his stomach lurch at the pain and shame in Sam’s voice.

“Can’t do that Sammy. Not like this. Not til I know we’re okay.”

There was a shuddering pause from behind the door, and Dean dug his fingers into the cheap motel carpet. Then he tried again.

“Sam, look I don’t care okay? Goddammit I don’t care if we never have sex again. I just wanna hold your hand, Sammy. That’s all. I just--”, and there was a crack in Dean’s voice as he paused, “--I just want to be able to touch you.”

The bathroom door flew open, Dean almost tumbling backwards it was so unexpected. Sam stood in the doorway looking down at him, his eyes full of fear and tears.

“You think I don’t want that too? I can’t make it stop Dean! I can’t make it go away. I’m broken, you understand? I’m broken and its never going to get better and you should just. You should just leave me.”

Dean felt the tears fall from his eyes, kneeling on the floor in front of his brother, and there was only desperate honesty in his voice when he replied softly,

“I can’t. I love you, Sam. I love you.”

Dean sat back on his heels, arms spreading to try and bare himself to Sammy, to show that there was no choice for him either.

The fight seemed to go out of Sam all at once and he slumped to the floor, his big hands raised to cover his head.

“I know you do Dean. I’m sorry, I don’t want you to leave. But I don’t know how to fix this”, Sam said. “All my life I’ve known how to fix things Dee, how to follow you wherever you go. But I don’t know how to do this.”

Every instinct in Dean’s body screamed for him to hold Sam, to wrap him in his arms and tell him it would be okay. But he didn’t. He was Dean Winchester, and if Sam could hurt this bad then he could too.

“Okay. It’s okay, Sammy. We’ll make it okay”, Dean said, and he thought it was the best lie he ever told.

\----------------

Two weeks later, another motel room. Dean was sitting on the bed, Sam stood awkwardly in front of him, a blindfold placed between them. Dean licked his lips nervously.

“So get this,” he said, and was rewarded with a snort of laughter from Sam, “I did some research, and I think this will help.”

Sam started to shake his head, but Dean interrupted him before he could say anything.

“It’s not for you. Its for me. See, these doctors, they reckon that it’s about control. So now, you can be in control. Capiche?”

Sam still looked unsure, but he nodded.

“Okay but… I’m not saying it’ll work, y’know? I’m not even in the mood and--”, Sam said, stuttering a little before trailing off.

Dean almost laughed.

“Sam, no offence but nor am I. This isn’t about that.”

The tension left Sam’s body and his eyes widened a little.

“Okay,” Sam said, “then what do you want me to do?”

Dean met Sam’s eyes, then picked the blindfold up and tied it snugly behind his head. He shifted around for a second, then adopted a loose pose, his legs crossed and his hands palm up on his knees.

“I want you to touch my hands.” Dean paused, to let the idea settle, before he continued. “I’m not gonna move, I promise. As much or as little as you want. You think you can do that?”

Dean’s breath sounded very loud with the blindfold on and he tried to control it, so Sam didn’t see how badly he wanted this to work. There was silence for a few moments, and Dean almost reached for the blindfold. But then he heard Sam move, and then the warmth of his body right in front of him.

The first touch was almost nothing, a little brush of Sam’s fingernail against the side of Dean’s thumb, but for Dean it was everything. He held still, like he’d promised, let Sam take his time. The next touch was worth it, the pad of Sam’s finger running up his index finger, and then back down. Dean had never noticed before how he could feel every groove of Sam’s skin, but just now it was the biggest sensation in the world. 

Sam didn’t pick up his pace like Dean thought he might. It wasn’t like opening a floodgate. But slowly, very slowly, it was more. First Sam traced each finger in turn with his, then each line of Dean’s palms. He rested his fingertips in Dean’s hands, let the weight sit just a moment. He ran his thumb over Dean’s nails. 

Sam’s whisper was almost as hesitant as his touch, when he spoke.

“I like your hands, Dee.”

Dean let his smile show across his face, slow and sure.

“I know Sammy,” he replied, his voice rough with love.

They stayed like that a few minutes more, Dean just letting Sam explore this small amount of skin in his own time, revelling in the contact. Then, very slowly, he pulled his hands up and took off the blindfold.

Sam was kneeling on the floor by the bed, his eyes filled with tears and a smile crooking the sides of his mouth. Dean always thought that Sam’s smile was trying to hide itself away, but he was letting Dean see it now.

“That’s all?”, Sam asked, confusion in his voice.

Dean nodded. “That’s all. We got all the time in the world Sammy.”

He thought perhaps he’d said something wrong, because that shame clouded Sam’s eyes again for a moment.

“I’m sorry. I know it’s not enough”, Sam said, dropping his eyes to the carpet again.

“Hey. Sam, don’t you dare think that. What you just did, that took guts. I know it. And it was enough. You’re enough for me Sammy, you always will be.”

Sam looked at Dean hard, searching his face for something, Dean didn’t know what. But he must have found it, because for the first time since Hell, Sam leaned in and gave him a gentle kiss. 

Dean let out a shuddering sigh as Sam sat back again.

“Love you, Sammy”

“Love you too, Dean”


	2. Pants

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam wants to take things further, but Dean knows just how to keep Sam hot

It had been about two weeks since Dean sat on their bed and let Sam touch his hands. He hadn’t pushed, after that, hadn’t wanted to break the fragile confidence Sammy was building, but he’d noticed the change. It was little things really - Sam allowing their hands to touch while they ate, the occasional weight of Sam’s hand on his shoulder. The way he leaned into Dean’s space to reach things in the kitchen. 

Dean almost didn’t want to try anything new, but the space between them was shrinking day by day and he couldn’t stop thinking about it. The tipping point came when Sam reached over in the Impala and started toying with his hair. Dean could barely resist a shiver, and when he glanced over at Sam it was like looking back in time. 

Sam’s eyes were focussed on the soft hair at the back of Dean’s head, his fingers carding through and running little scratches over his scalp.

“Sammy…. You keep doin that and I’m gonna cause an accident”, Dean said. He kept his voice low and soft, trying not to break Sam’s trance.

“Feels so nice Dee”, Sam whispered back, his attention still fixed on Dean’s hair.

Dean took a deep breath and tried to concentrate on the road, the purr of the car’s engine, anything to distract him from how nice Sam’s hand felt. It was a mercy when he saw a sign for a motel just a few minutes later, and he managed to pull them into the parking lot without hitting anything at all.

“I’m gonna go check us in, okay?”, Dean said.

Sam seemed to kinda shake himself, his eyes coming back into focus, before he pulled his hand away a little guiltily. 

“Yeah, sure. I’ll uhh. I’ll get the bags.”

Dean nodded, then swung himself out of the car and hurried off to check in with the desk clerk. When he got back to the car a few minutes later, Sam was ready and waiting with the duffles, and Dean led them to the room. He could feel his heartbeat racing at the look in Sam’s eyes, soft heat that he hadn’t seen since before Hell.

They were barely through the doorway when Dean felt Sam close the space between them, his brother’s hands wrapping around his waist and hanging on to his belt. Then Sam’s tongue was on his neck and Dean lost most coherent thought.

Sam’s breath was hot and fast on his skin, licking a deliberate path from the back of Dean’s neck to his ear, both of them groaning when Sam bit the soft skin of Dean’s shoulder. Dean could feel arousal buzzing in the pit of his stomach, his cock hard in his jeans as he reached a hand back to push into Sam’s hair. 

The position stretched Dean out beautifully for Sam’s slow touch. First his hands rose up Dean’s body, touching and tracing over the muscles and scars of his stomach, then skimming higher to graze over his nipples through the rough fabric of his shirt. Dean gasped at that, the mix of harsh and sweet driving all thoughts from his mind apart from Sam, always Sam.

“What do you want, Sammy?”, Dean whispered, letting his hips buck into Sam’s hands.

Sam nosed at the base of Dean’s neck before replying, his voice almost lost in the curve of Dean’s skin.

“Want you, Dean. God I want you so bad.”

It was all Dean needed to hear. With a low growl he span around and caught Sam’s lips with his own, revelling in their softness, in the sweet taste of Sam in his mouth again. Sam seemed to almost melt into him, then the fierceness was back, each of them opening to the other and licking deep into each other’s mouths. 

Dean bit down on Sam’s lip, feeling his cock twitch at the little gasp Sam gave. He was just reaching to pull Sam’s shirt off, get to the gorgeous tanned skin beneath, when he saw it. Just for a moment, when Dean’s hands touched the tender skin of Sammy’s sides, Sam flinched. But then it was gone, replaced by a mix of that heat and something else. Dean thought it was determination. 

In the moment he had to react, Dean pulled his hands away and back up to Sam’s arms, letting his thoughts run while he kissed his brother silly again. Then he grinned to himself.

Sam felt the smile against his mouth and pulled back, cocking his head questioningly.

“Got an idea, baby brother”, Dean said, starting to walk them backwards towards the bed.

“Does it involve a blindfold again?”, Sam replied teasingly, tugging on Dean’s belt loops to grind their hips together so hard Dean almost forgot his plan.

Dean laughed a little breathlessly.

“No blindfold. Just this-”, and with that Dean had Sam right where he wanted him. He sat down heavy on the bed, pulling Sam into his lap, knees spread on either side of Dean.

Dean kept one arm behind Sam, supporting his brother as they kissed, Sam’s hair falling forward when he leant down to lick along Dean’s jawline. The other hand slid slowly up Sam’s thigh, tracing a path over hot denim-clad muscle until he brushed against Sam’s cock.

Sam hissed, arching his back into Dean’s touch, which was exactly what Dean wanted. He stroked Sam through his jeans again, feeling him pulse and throb in reply, and at the same time he very deliberately licked Sam’s nipple through his shirt.

Sam let out a long low groan, throwing his head back to give Dean more access.

“Knew you’d like that Sammy. Remember all those times--”, Dean paused to bite Sam’s chest gently through the cloth, “--in back alleys? Outside diners? Always could make you come in your pants.”

Sam moaned again, hips thrusting up into Dean’s hand, seeking more friction on his needy cock. Dean rubbed harder, brushing over the head again and again in time with his tongue licking Sam’s nipples.

“God Dean your mouth!”, Sam breathed, his hands falling back to support himself on Dean’s knees. Dean took the chance to free up his other hand, bringing it round to tug on Sam’s hair and flick his nipple, now standing hard under the mouth-wet fabric of his shirt.

Dean could feel Sam was getting close, the little thrusts he was making getting shorter and more urgent, and he wanted nothing more than to tip him over the edge. He picked up the pace on Sam’s cock, knowing the friction must almost hurt now, Sam chasing the burn, and raised his other hand to Sam’s mouth.

“Open up”, Dean said, and Sam did, letting Dean slide two of his saliva slick fingers into Sam’s mouth. With a little pressure, Dean pulled Sam’s face back down towards his.

As their eyes met, Dean spoke again.

“Always did look better with your mouth full,” he said knowingly, and that was it.

Sam’s whole body tensed as he came, Dean pulling his hand back to anchor in Sam’s hair as the other pushed him through the orgasm, steady pressure on his cock til Sam was whining and pulling away. As Sam came down from the high, Dean quickly leant back and rolled, pulling Sam with him into a tight embrace.

“That’s it baby, I’ve got you, so good Sammy”, Dean praised, whispering his pleasure into Sam’s hair. He felt the tension leave Sam’s body as he recovered himself, and then to Dean’s horror Sam sobbed.

“Sam? Sammy? What is it? Did I do something wrong?”, Dean said frantically, leaning back to try and look Sam in the face.

Sam tilted his head up to meet Dean’s gaze, a smile shining through his tears.

“No I just. I didn’t think I could do that, you know? I haven’t--- not even by myself. Not since--”, Sam trailed off, sobs shaking through his body again.

Dean allowed some of the panic to leave him as he started to stroke Sam’s back.

“Yeah. I know Sammy. But you looked so fucking hot, baby brother. So hot. Love it when you come like that, all helpless in my lap.”

Sam let out a laugh through his slowing sobs.

“How’d you know, Dee?”, Sam asked.

Dean pulled Sam a little closer and kissed him gently, wiping away the tears with his thumb.

“I always know, Sammy, okay? I got you.”

**Author's Note:**

> If you want more of this, tell me! Comments make my heart go smush :)


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